A lot of people move to LA. There are people from Chicago, Wisconsin, Maryland, Kansas, Hawaii, the list goes on. A lot of people who move to LA tend to speak of their lives in two separate eras: "before I came to LA" and "once I moved here." As in, "Before I came to LA I drove like an old lady, once I moved here I started to drive like a douche." Not that everything has to change once you move, it's just that things have a tendency to do so. And keep in mind there's a definite difference between living in California and living in a city like LA in California. Like any other place, cities in California are just different than towns; they're bigger.
"Before I came to LA" I was a bitch. High-strung, high-maintenance, demanding. I knew what I wanted and continually, almost made it a point, to completely disregard what everyone else wanted. "Once I moved here" nothing changed, at first. Then what seemed like out of nowhere, I started to sort of become a better person. Maybe it was because I started to realize that if you constantly surround yourself with people who accept and/or encourage bad behavior, then you will accept and/or encourage bad behavior. I hate the saying, but a lot of the times it's true: you are who your friends are. But once you change the people in that equation, you have the possibility of bettering yourself and begin to learn to accept and encourage understanding, kindness, and generosity.
For a long time I was very good friends with a group of people who accepted that I was a bitch. They didn't necessarily encourage my being a bitch, but they definitely didn't do anything to help me stop being a bitch. So I didn't really know there was anything wrong with it. Now when I first moved, the people I became friends with initially, LOVED my being a bitch. It was entertaining for them, which is what I was for them: entertainment. Then I met more new people, and these people just so happened to be really nice. At first glance they just seemed like your usual run of the mill polite people. But soon I came to realize that their politeness wasn't out of any obligation, because they had no obligation to be nice to me, it was rooted somewhere deeper. It was like, they were innately kind. And this to me was the weirdest thing ever. Because personally, I've been called a lot of things in my life, but kind has never been one of them. The more I saw of this kindness I had never experienced, the more I wanted to reciprocate. The thing is though, I'm starting to see that it takes a while to learn to let go of the bitch you were for however many years. Maybe because you got used to her, or maybe because it's who you really are. But the more I experience the simple fact that it's a lot easier to be nice than it is to be mean (and I'm all for minimal effort with maximum result) the more I think (and definitely hope) that I'm making some pretty good progress.