And the saddest part was that he would never know.

I have no reason to stay here she said. Of course you do, you love this city, he responded. I think I’m allowed to love more than one city she retorted. He shrugged and delivered a I guess so. What she wanted to say was that all she needed was one tiny reason to stay, but she knew he would never give her that. She really would like to stay and everyone knew it but him.

In a few short years she had fallen in love with both the good and the bad in the so-called city of angels. Even the traffic wasn’t such a big deal to her on most days. The air was always perfect, the sky the perfect shade of blue (in most parts of the city anyway) and the people were the best part. Living in Los Angeles, actually living not merely attending school in L.A., had instilled in her a sense of adventure. Angelinos come from all over. Many have seen the world and chosen to settle down in LA, many come looking to fulfill a dream, and some come just because the weather’s nice. Whatever reason, it is a city of wanderers and adventure-seeking folk. While the more affluent jet-setters travel to several nations, others are content to take a drive and explore the rest of the state, and on an even smaller scale, explore the city. There will always be somewhere in the city you’ve never been to, and visiting, exploring, and experiencing new things are what make Angelinos, Angelinos. She loved it.

And yet, she was forcing herself to leave it. You could say it was so that she could come back and appreciate the city more. You could also say it was to see what living on the opposite coast was like. You could even say it was just because she could. And while all of those reasons were in fact true, the real reason she knew she had to leave was that it had all begun to become unbearable. There was a limit to how many times she could lose him right in front of her eyes and that limit was soon to be reached. And so, she let him go. With all her things in boxes in her mother’s garage, and with her one huge luggage equipped with all she would need for a year, she hugged her family goodbye. Everyone had accompanied her to the airport, everyone but him.

She knew he couldn’t make it, he was working as usual. So they had their platonic goodbyes prior to her departure. But of course she wished for that movie script ending where he’d rush through the gates and bribe security to let him through so that just as she was about to hand the flight attendant her ticket he’d yell her name and beg her not to go. He would proclaim his love for her in front of hundreds of strangers in the airport, and then he’d take her in his arms and kiss her just like in a Clark Gable movie. But he never came.

She boarded the flight alone, and as she took her seat she sighed and prayed to God that she’d forget him. That one year would be enough to let him go. That one year would change everything. That in one year she’d find someone else who would love her back. But mostly she prayed that her leaving might make him love her. That’s the thing about prayers. Sometimes they feel like nothing more than wishes that we make ourselves believe in more. And many times wishes don’t come true. She prayed anyway. Because unlike wishes, God was in charge of prayers. And she had to believe that God had some kind of plan, hopefully an even better plan than she had ever imagined for herself.